The art of the swipe episode 1: Should you cross a border for a date?

Short answer: probably not.

And yet, that's exactly what I did! How am I still alive, you ask? That's a great question. I can tell you that it's not because I was extremely careful.

A little bit of background...

This story takes place in July 2021. I was recently single after ending a long-distance relationship. I decided I was ready to enter the dating scene again. When I make decisions, I have a tendency to go all in. Sometimes, a bit too much.

I had never been on dating apps in my life before. But in a few minutes, with the help of a couple of friends, I had created my first Tinder profile (yay!). I soon realised that "swiping" was a highly addictive activity. But it was too late: I was deep into frantic swiping territory and determined to make it work. After all, I wasn't looking for a relationship. There must be someone out there who will want to be my cuddle buddy, right?

Fast forward a couple days

and my first date is planned, in another city an hour away. And this is where you will start to question my sanity:

I live in a city of 200'000 people. Why in the world am I going so far away?
I am taking the last bus going out with no way of coming back home.
This guy has to drive down from another town, 1 hour 40 minutes drive from the date location. I have never met him and only have him on Snapchat.

In case you still had doubts, any of these should be an immediate nono. I do not recommend going on a date if any of the above three conditions are met.

But I still went! And with a couple drinks, I can talk to anyone. So yeah, we had a few drinks, it went alright. We go back to his car and make the decision to go back to his place, an hour and 40 minute drive away. I mean, technically, I couldn't do much else. And I was on a mission. So in my brain, everything was right on track.

Bing Bang Badaboom

we are now in the morning. And I realise what I have done. What am I doing so far away? Do I even like this guy (no, I do not)? He's not being very nice to me either. I even learned that I was a rebound for a guy who is right out of an 8-year relationship and smokes more than anyone I've ever seen. In addition to this, I am hungover, stuck in the middle of nowhere (thankfully with all my organs) and I just want to go home. He clearly also wants me to go home. So we're on the same page, at least.

I am aware that this is all my fault. My actions have led me to this moment of regret, with my only relief being that I am alive and that it will make a good story.

So, what now? How do I go home?

I don't know why, but in my head, he would drive me down to the nearest city since it sounded like he goes there quite often. Or at least to the train station, a 3-minute drive from his place, especially since it was pouring rain outside. But of course, he was "busy" (it was his day off). So I left with my own two feet, no umbrella, and a lovely headache. What a great start to the 5-hour train journey ahead of me.

I have two stops, including one in a small town of 3000 people whose name contains the word "ass" in my native language. If that's not a message from the universe, I don't know what is.

After a long and exhausting journey,

I arrive at my student residence, and promise myself to never do this again. However, as you can see from the title of this series, my bad decisions didn't stop there. But there is time and lots of stories to tell.

Conclusion & tips

Don't cross a border for a Tinder date.
If you don't want to respect rule 1, make sure you have a way of coming home and that at least one person knows where you are going (sharing location is great!)
Snapchat is a huge 🚩 as a communication method. I will expand on this in future stories.